Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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