So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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