Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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