She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
