How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
