Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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