just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
