My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize
