he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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