you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Randomize
