I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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