how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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