5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
