Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
