Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
