question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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