He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
