i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
