Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
