MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
