No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
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