Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
