I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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