I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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