I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
