What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
