we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
