I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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