you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
