i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
