just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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