do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
