TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
