my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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