Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
