covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
