I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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