Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
