So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
