My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Randomize