You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
