ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
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