Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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