scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
