My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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