There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Are my feet made of real feet?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize