Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize