wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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