Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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