Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
