Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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