i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
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